The dichotomy post. Or something.

These are baseball card evaluations that try a collector's soul.

We received an enormous pouch, yes pouch, not mere envelope, of baseball cards from the kindhearted lonestarr, formerly cubby lonestarr. Almost immediately, it became evident that there were dichotomies to contend with, dualities to wrestle, differences to dive into.

For instance, which is the better picture of this 1983 Topps card of Mr. Anderson? The sad-eyed bearded roundfaced fellow, or

the merely mustachioed happy-eyed smile guy?
Who shall be proclaimed 2008 Allen & Ginter chin patch victor--Putz or Helton? Who on this 2009 Topps card has the best dance moves?

What is more compelling, an individual who once starred on 'BJ and the Bear,' a TV show about a cute guy, a semi-truck, and a chimpanzee, or a happy young lad unfazed by the fact that he is the namesake of a notorious bank robber and cop killer?
Which smile is more appealing to behold, that of the clean-shaven surgery maven Tommy John or that of the clean-shaven Mets catcher John Stearns (cleanshavenness is a rare trait in 1983 Topps)?
When looking at these two shiny baseball cards from competing companies--one a bizarre shot of Mickey Mantle with his two-bat tarp and one an unremarkable but wordy rendition of David Wright being earnest--which card staggers forth victorious into the nonrefractive light?

When peering at these two Zito Effect David Wright cards, which gets put in the Lucy DW binder fastest?
Hint: even though the front has a Beltran ghost, the back does not, and is in fact numbered.
And of these two goofy cartoonish renditions of pitchers who...well, never mind about the pitcher part...which makes you think more of Mad magazine? Decisions, decisions.

No comments: