Life on Planet Zito.

We do things differently up here on Planet Zito. For one thing, we surf everywhere, even to the grocery store. The only time we don't surf is when we play baseball, and then to loosen up, we do yoga poses in the outfield. We like the number 75 on Planet Zito; it's as high as we are and "looks like a shelf" to hold up our last name. And let me tell you, chicks dig PZ. Big time.

Because we're hunky and really, really rich and this year, our pitching doesn't stink too bad. So look out. That's all we're sayin'.

PS Did you know that on Planet Zito, our uncle is:

If you thought we were kidding about that, you'd be wrong. You could look it up. Over and out.

thank you to chris o. for the groovy refractor!


Collective Troll said...

I wish I lived on Planet Zito... I always liked the guy because he and my son share the same birthday-May 13th. I think it was the topic of my third blog...I think the idea of surfing to the grocery store would have a very positive environmental impact. Is there no pollution on planet zito?

dc said...

There is zero pollution. Zero standing in lines. Zero population growth. And zero rudeness. All in all, quite an acceptable place. Plus everyone's uncle is Patrick Duffy.