State of the Union Drinking Baseball Card Game.

Ok, so we don't drink much. Variations/additions welcome in comments. If we stick together, we can endure this.

Obama says "let me be clear"
Flip one Barry Zito card into envelope marked "Dinged Corners"

Obama says "yes we will"
Put two Chipper Jones (or Babe Ruth) cards in mail to dayf

Obama says "make no mistake"
Chew some old baseball card bubblegum

Obama says, "Let me be clear, yes we will, make no mistake"
Chew a minimum of three pieces of bubblegum and post a picture of yourself doing so

Joe Wilson yells something
Very well, consider taking a drink

Obama yells back
Oh, just finish the bottle

Obama says "jobs" more than five times
Update your resume, but date it 2013

Obama says "health care"
If you got a paper cut when placing that Zito card in the Dinged Corners envelope, just remember you are SOL

Obama says "health care" more than three times
Mail David Plouffe a baseball card of Curt Schilling

Nancy Pelosi looks vacant and blinks
2010 Mets cards into the Dinged Corners envelope, one per blink

Obama mentions Bo the Dog
Place a baseball card into your dog's water bowl

Joe Biden falls asleep
Send Dinged Corners a gift certificate to Blowout Cards; if Biden laughs inappropriately at some point, send us two gift certificates

Obama uses the term "Congressional leadership"
If you haven't choked on your drink, arrange to send a truckload of common baseball cards to dump on the Capitol steps

Obama says what a great idea the bailouts were for the economy
Run outside and use your brightest chrome refractors to reflect the sun and try to take out all the satellites so you no longer have to feel cynical about broadcasts such as these

Obama invites the world over for a beer on the White House lawn
Accept. Americans can be crabby, but are ever hopeful

So. Any other ideas?


Sooz said...

This is really funny. I won't be watching the State of the Union though.

Let me know what I need to send you in the end.

Spiff said...

Every time President Obama says "historic" or "unprecedented" drop a Rangers card in an envelope for Spiff. ;)

Mr. Scott said...

I didn't realize you were Zito fan till I read this post I have a ton of Zito cards maybe we can make a trade. Hit me up at Scott_sergiano@yahoo.com

The Mojo Hand said...

Obama Saya

The I.M.F The WOrld Bank, The Federal Reserve, are should really be giving this speech drink all you got..

Mark's Ephemera said...

Should a Supreme Court Justice yawn on camera send any and all Hershisers to Mark's Ephemera.

If there is any mention of budget cuts to the Arts, Education, Library of Congress, or the National Archive System, send a nasty letter to Washington.

dayf said...

I will also accept Yogis in lieu of Chippers, Ruths or Chipperuths.

Yes we will.

White Sox Cards said...

Every time Obama mentions Chicago, Springfield or Illinois, put a White Sox card in an envelope for Steve. LOL :)